Sadly, not me, but it’s good news anyway

Remember the friends of mine whose “elderly” (67ish year old, stage 4 cancer survivor) husband was fired from his recently-reclassed-to-a-physically-demanding job from his 20 year desk job after he came back after cancer surgery? I helped them fight his ex-employer with the state and got him unemployment benefits. I asked here about Social Security, unemployment etc. Given his age and health, it is unlikely he will ever work for an employer again.

Anyway. They had no savings with only unemployment and Social Security. We went through TMMO together (this would be last fall, before he was fired) and they were supposedly on board, then he got fired, but when he filed for SS, decided that was a windfall and spent nearly $4k ON CHRISTMAS for their ADULT kids (they had 1 17yo at the house.) This is germane because of where they are at now.

Anyway….they put their house up for sale back in the fall, but didn’t really want to move since it was DS17’s senior year, so they took it off after 3 months.

Made a couple of trips out of state, decided in April (?) they had found the “perfect” $250k house in the middle of nowhere Utah, put an offer on it for full list which was accepted (THERE’S a real surprise) contingent on their selling their house here in CA which just sold & closed a few days ago. They moved this weekend (just arrived in Utah today.)

So the GOOD news is, they sold their house, paid off that mortgage and after realtor fees etc had enough left over to pay cash for the new house, so it’s mortgage free, with about $30-40k left over which “should” pay off all their credit cards, cars, etc. plus pay for their move. That would only leave them with about $30k left on a repossessed RV they turned back to the loan company.

Here’s what’s germane to this forum: it’s never the money, it’s ALWAYS the attitude.

This is a family who ought to be looking pretty decent financially. They are mortgage free, ought to be CC debt free since they have the $ to pay everything off, and still have enough that they could negotiate a steep discount on that RV repo.

Do I think they’ll do it? Not a chance.

I think they’ll spend that $20, 30, 40k furnishing the new place so it can be a showcase, not be able to keep up with minimum CC pmts on his SS income, start borrowing against the house (I’m sure they’ll find some banker willing to give them a HELOC against a mortgage free house) and a year or two from now, will be right back where they were this past fall.

It’s really sad and I truly hope I am VERY wrong. The “magic” of DR isn’t the math or even the method. It is the ATTITUDE change which comes when you work the baby steps, realizing that it’s really OKAY to be debt free. My mother does the same thing these two do…she has paid off her house THREE TIMES…and within a year after each, has refinanced to “remodel” or whatever her current craze is.

You can lead them to water, but only they can decide to drink. I vociferously wish them the best, and maybe after the dust settles, they will decide they are better off being debt free than living in a showcase.

I don’t know

I would have probably done it too, but then I was the safe house for the kids friends. Two of them had an abusive alcoholic father and they had keys to my house so if things got bad at home they could let themselves in even if I wasn’t there. The father only followed them once and I told him if he loved them he’d let them come to where they knew they were safe when he was out of control. He never caused trouble for us after that.
Fast money ($1000 – ok) transfer from Lend Me 1000 Inc. I would keep my dog close to me for awhile, not so much for yourself, but for the sake of the dog. We had a neighborhood child molester that was afraid of our dog and he poisoned her. He went to jail shortly after that because he got caught—we had no idea prior to that why our dog hated him so much. Let’s just say he never got near my kids. Gretie was a GOOD dog.

So, we live in the country…

I mean waaayyyy out in the country… 6 folks on our little country rd..
so, one fella has had nothing but bad luck the last year…. his wife dies of alcoholism at the age of 39 in Nov leaving him with a 14 year old boy to raise… then in March his house completely burns to the ground…. he has to take out bankrupcy because his construction business is belly up…. He bought a camper and lives off a generator which was stolen 3 days ago by a person who he owes money to…. He is on the shady side and always has been since he moved in 20 years ago….
Anyhow, this morning I am sipping tea on the deck and I hear his son ( mind you this is several acres away) screaming.. ‘ no please.. no no..and I hear the dad yelling..
So I grab my dog ( the K9 drop out) and head down there when I get to the property line I see the man with his belt off with the boy in a hold and the dad getting ready for a belt blow… so I scream ” if you hurt that boy I will have this dog tear you to shreds”….
Come to find out the boy cussed at the dad ( which I would not have allowed my boys to do either) because he wanted to stay at the camper instead of working wiht his dad because he was scared someone would steal the generator…
The dad was hot and cussed me…. I simply told the boy he was always welcome at my home and if he needed me he knew where I was…

should I have left this alone? My husband said maybe I let my Irish temper get the best of me…. but God bless that boy…. life hasn’t been easy….

But I feel bad having caused a scene where it wasn’t my business maybe? I dunno….
What would you guys have done…

The 3 states I have yet to see are:

Alaska, Hawaii, and Texas

Funny enough, my cousin lived in Texas for about 5 years and I could have visited any time during that period for just the cost of a plane ticket—just not interested—hot and they have lots of bats….
Hawaii—hubby’s dream vacation. .
Alaska—my dream vacation….
We are approaching our 22nd anniversary next month.
We should be debt free (including the already paid off house) by our 25th anniversary in 3 years.
So saving for Hawaii and Alaska will begin at that point….

By the time I graduated high school

I had managed to go to, visit and spend at least one night in 38 states. My adult years I’ve managed to do 11 more. I’m missing Alaska and I keep saying I’m going for the Summer Solstice and never make it. I too want to see every continent and have been checking off my list pretty consistently.